ΜΙΛΗΣΤΕ ΜΟΥ!!!!!!!!!!

I was in my desk. I was chewing gum. Chewuing gum run out of flavor, due to chewing for a long time. I was too bored to go to the kitchen to get rid of it. I thought about stucking it for some minutes, below my desk. it was a bad habit that I used to have between 3-9 years, ago. I stoped doing that habit for a very long time.

While my thoughts were suggesting me to stuck it, for some time, below my desk, I remembered that bad habit that I used to do years ago. Automatically, I got a bad feeling abou this. A "I must not do it again" popped up in my head because of a possible promise to God that I may have forgotten. It was just a random thought and a bad feeling. I ignored it but I did not stuck my gum below my desk in the end.

Some days ago, I stuck a gum in my bookcase for some time. I freaked because that bad feeling I had when I was thinking about sticking my gum below my desk, popped up again.

I started thinking

What If I made a rushed promise to God not to stick gum and I have forgotten about it?

I calmed myself down by thinking that I am ill and God knows that. But that created a new worry

What if the promise was made before my ocd illness? Then, there is no excuse for me if I broke a promise.

I started worrying. I tried to calm myself down by thinking

I never made a promise because I remember anything related to a promise to God. Then, why I felt that bad feeling when I was on my desk?

It's as if my subconscious remembers it but I do not. That bad feeling just created all these worrying thoughts. Why I felt like that? I remember that many times, when I was ready to do something that I stopped doing for a very long time, my ocd was like

You are going to do something that you stopped doing for some time. Why you stopped doing it? Perhaps, you made a rushed promise to God that you cant remember?

I guess that was the reason I got that bad feeling. Since sticking gum was an old habit, and a bad one, that I stoped, I got that bad feeling.

Also, I think 9 years ago, when I was touching cleaned spots on my desk that still had some gum left, I was always going to wash my hands compulsively. And, I think, there was a time, that I was touching that spots, accidentally, and I was washing my hands, and then, accidentally, I was touching the spots and then, again I was washing my hands for a second and third time. I guess, that created a "must not do it" in my subconscious. This combined with my new ocd about promises to God, generated that bad feeling.

The more I analyze it and try to remember somethting that I never did, the more worried I become.

I remember, almost, anything related to a promise. So, I would remember if i ever made a promise about not sticking gum. Besides, I would never make a promise about such a stupid thing. I have trouble with ocd promises when it is the only way out of pressure. But, what if I do not remember it just because it was a promise related to something stupid?

I worry because if I ever made such a promise, I cant blame it on my ocd, because it was probably, made before my ocd illness. That is why I worry. And all this was generated by a bad feeling.

ΤΙ ΝΑ ΣΟΥ ΠΟΥΜΕ; ΘΕΣ ΒΟΗΘΕΙΑ ΕΙΔΙΚΟΥ ΑΜΕΣΑ!

Το να τα γράφεις σε Ελληνικό φόρουμ στα Αγγλικά τι σε βοηθάει και τι περιμένεις να σου πούμε;

OCD Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, rather coercive disorder, this the terminology. I am not expert but this is my understanding as what is your problem. So, you need at first to see a psychologist rather of the Cognitive Behavioral Method. Based on this method you will rather familiarise yourself to stop this behavior as a though in your mind in order to change your behavior. You have to do some decisive steps, recognise your negative/distorted thought and don't let it to continue, i.e. think for something else. Doing this agaian and again the problem will cease steadily in the long term.
Write in Greek to let the other members of the forum assist you...

Your problem if you dont go to a doctor will be far more worse than it is now you have to go and after you calm down come here with clear mind to learn what you want to learn
Οκ δικε μου ???

κι αυτος ο ανθρωπος τωρα, φοβαται να παρει φαρμακα, για να μην τον πειραξουν.....